Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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