Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
Randomize
