I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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