Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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