so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us�
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
