Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
your life is going to be an empowering working mom montage tomorrow to Katy P's ROAR... --are you living in a yoplaít comercial?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
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