hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
