i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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