my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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