This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
We left the knife in your bed.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I got so drunk that I peed my bed...and all over him. The ironic thing is that he slept in his swimming trunks.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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