Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I think your dad took our porno
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Randomize
