I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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