If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Randomize
