you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
