i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
