ugly people sure do ruin things
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
