If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
Randomize
