I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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