just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
