I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
