NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
Randomize
