I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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