fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I just spent the past twenty minutes checking out a girl who turned out to be a mannequin. I need AA.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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