plz talk dirty to me
I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Dude we need to hang out soon. I'm in the mood to get arrested again.
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize
