respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
Life lesson: Don't give a drunk girl a dutch oven after having taco bell. She puked all over my pillow. Funny as hell though.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
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