There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Randomize
