So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
