hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I think my vagina is haunted
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
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