Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
