i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
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