i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
