Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
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