It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
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