A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
The air taste purple.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
