When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
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