We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
im pretty sure while i was fucking her my dog was fucking her dog too
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
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