His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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