operation have a gay friend backfired
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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