you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
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