It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
