Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
He threatened my life and my car because I called you. Are you sure you never slept with him ?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
Randomize
