maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
