I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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