I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
foreskin is a definite game changer
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize
