The first thing on our $10,000 damage bill was "condoms in the main drain"
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I wish I could have a tequila IV with me all the time. Intravenous tequila intoxication.
Randomize
