doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
