I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Randomize
