Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
