If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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