i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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